Funny quotes and humor - 19

Mind and tongue in check:
girl with zipped mouth. a way of keeping the tongue on leash.

Ever active mouth &
"If the mind is in check and the flapping tongue is on leash  many a  problem can be kept at bay. If not, you will be heading for  serious trouble".

Unwanted guest:
Unwanted guest.
 ''It is nice to have guests in your house.  Mind you, an unwanted. over-bearing,  nosy guest is the most disgusting character on your premises".
 Dame luck:

Man with a fish.
"Regardless of  your talents and toil, unless  you have  elements of luck,  no progress can be made.  Bear in mind,  guided  by "Dame Luck", a man may come out of a bone dry well with a live fish in his mouth".

Secret between husband and wife:

Rooster and day break www.shutterstock.comw
Rooster and day break.
Hiding a secret from your beloved wife is an impossible thing, 
because ....... " Hiding a secret from your wife is like trying 
to  sneak a daybreak past a rooster".           
                                 .......  Lou Walters, American Journalist